Here's one of the notes about Jorge Posada....
Yeah so that was weird. YOU GUYS I'M NOT EVEN A YANKEES FAN.
More recently I wrote out ideas for a screenplay and started trying to write the premise for it. It's too long to screenshot so I'll copy it verbatim here so everyone can see how truly crazy I am. To be fair though, I'm guessing I wrote a sample screenplay because of my screenwriting class and the things I am talking about are loosely based on my life so it's not really that weird... but hopefully this makes sense to someone but it sure doesn't to me!
I start out by writing
"ideas for comedic screenplay"
then I get into potential titles
"infinite shades of no"
"stages of no"
"stages"
then I launched into describing what I think the screenplay will entail and apparently I don't give a crap about basic literacy skills while I'm asleep...
"woman trying and failing to get into the industry tries her luck at singing, writing, acting, modeling, comedy, porn, children's shows(*edit*worrisome that those two are so close together), commercials, parties, nothing seems to work. constantly changing everything about herself is eating her up inside. she becomes a disney garbage girl to pay for her failed gigs and ends up making her way by starting a vlog called disneys dumpster...
meets a man along the way whom she could use to help her get to the top but she tells him no and leaves him behind because she don't need no man. once she gets to the top, she just wants out and to be sweeping at disney and riding the rides with her friends. it's too lonely at the top and sometimes the people you meet at the bottom and end up stepping on are the best."
It continues after a page break with a little self-identification/deprecation/motivation and I think this is where I am actually starting the screenplay...
"my skin is not smooth. I got a nosejob because of soccer. I wore a phantom of the opera mask for two months (for those who don't believe me)
I had two black eyes and went to the ER bc my nose wouldn't stop bleeding. I am not skinny. I am not fat. I am a certain weight composed of bodily fluids/things and a lot of bad judgement. my eyebrows look like little kittens. they are not cute. I am living proof females can get beer bellies. I have wrinkles at the age of 21. my retainer shoved my teeth too far inward. I have wisdom teeth floating somewhere in my head and that scares me. I like me.
I'm not pretty im not ugly I'm not perfect I'm me. I like me. (*edit*OK ALEXIS WE GET IT???)
I worked at a zoo once. I eat way too much Mexican food. my idea of exercise these days is standing up to turn on the tv and then walking back to the couch. also, I walk downstairs to use the microwave and do my laundry but that's only every four months.
I am constantly being told no.
hey can I have that French fry?
no
do you want to go get drinks on Tuesday?
nope
is that your dad
nah
can i have your orange?
um no
Orange you glad I didn't say
absolutely not
but also in more serious ways like
professor is there extra credit
no
when are your office hours
no
but whe-
no. (door closes)
when you know you just NO shakes head...
that's when I knew I had to leave. this place wasn't giving me anything except for an unwelcome gut and the newest trial Taco Bell menu item which almost convinced me to stay.
I went to live with my mom and sister in California who when I asked them if I could move in... guess what they said
YES
but with conditions of course
I had to get a job and pay some rent
I didn't have a room but could sleep on the couch
it was a done deal."
That's the screenplay that's going to change the world and I wrote it all in my sleep. Jealous?
Please don't steal it because that will be embarrassing. And also, it's obviously unfinished. My best writing happens when I'm unconscious. Good. Thank you for tuning into this edition of Insomniaction.
